There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Duck Duck Cougar?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
