So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
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Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
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im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize