i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
The power of my boobs compel you
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
