Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
