I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
