I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
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