He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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