Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
