if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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