i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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