so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
