fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
