You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
