This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
