what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize