i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize