i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
