My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
