This girl is more easily done than said...
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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