Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
