your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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