Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
