Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
