Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
