Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize