He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
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he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
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I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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