I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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