I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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