I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
