come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
