lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
