Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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