i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
