I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
