i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
