so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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