he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
