Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
