This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize