I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
