He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Randomize
