Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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