He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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