i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
