My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Randomize
