I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
