Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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