$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I am one with the molecules
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
