Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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