I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
